This week at church was woman's Sunday. I was asked to portray the character of Mary Magdalene for the service. I wrote a piece about what it meant to follow Jesus from the eyes of Mary Magdalene. As I researched it a few weeks ago and spoke it today, I realized how profoundly Mary had been healed by Jesus. She had so much hurt and pain, and Jesus took that pain from her, and suffered himself on the cross for her pain. I saw a lot of myself reflected in this piece, in her sorrow and grief of her pain from her "demons", the way she was scared that she would never truly be healed, her desire to stay with the Lord and trust that he would give her what she needed to continue on. This is my piece for today. I read it, and then sang the song "Alive" while this video played part way through.
Before I knew of hope and light, my
filthy hair hung matted against my head. Dark smudges covered my face, perhaps it
was mud, perhaps dried blood. My ragged clothes were torn, dirty, putrid. I
wore no shoes as I wandered through the town of Magdala. In my eyes, one could
only see darkness, a deep darkness with no hope of life. The demons inside caused
me to curse the name of the Lord. They filled me with hatred and bitterness,
anguish and torment. Horrific nightmares plagued my sleep, and violent, uncontrollable
rage filled my waking hours. People called me Mad Mary of Magdala. People say I
was a prostitute. People say I was the Sinner with a capitol S that anointed
Jesus’ feet. Those things were untrue but I was Mad Mary, tormented by seven
demons.
Then I met Jesus, the man who transformed me. He knew me and He knew my hurt. He came to me, Mad Mary, and by the power of his love, he turned my darkness into dawn. I was no longer Mad Mary, I was just Mary.
After my Lord drove the demons and pain out of my body, I could have returned to my home in Magdala. Before I had been Mad Mary, I had had a home, a life there. Yet, I was frightened. How would the people back home react to me? Would they still see me as Mad Mary? And I was afraid that one day Mad Mary would return. Would I again become Mad Mary when my Savior left? I did not want to leave this man’s side who turned darkness to light. Instead of returning home, I surrendered everything I had once had for this holy man and his ministry.
But one day, men came and took my Lord. Most of His male disciples fled, but my woman friends and I, we stood firm. We did not run. We did not lie about our commitment. For every agonizing hour, we watched him beaten, stripped naked, and nailed to a cross. My Savior who healed my brokenness, now suffered beyond anything I could imagine. We stood nearby through it all silently, watching the Lord we loved breathe his last breath.
My friend’s son took Him from the cross, and placed him in the tomb. We kept a silent vigil as sorrow and grief filled our hearts. Our Lord, who loved us fully, who had given us hope and light and life, was dead. He was dead! He had loved us, in the way only He could love. How could we now live fully without His love?
Alive - Mary Magdalene by Natalie Grant
When He spoke my name in the garden that day it was not “Mad Mary.” But my name: Mary. When he spoke my name, he announced my total restoration and transformation. The power of His love conquered the Mad Mary, never to return. His love brought life and light to my eyes. Death has lost and love has won.
I still see the power of Jesus' love in my life. While I have not physically been restored and transformed, I know that He still speaks my name, Sarah, with love. He has conquered a lot of my fear and sorrow in my pain, and has healed me a lot emotionally from the strain of every day chronic pain. I have experienced physical healing in some ways, and in other ways, I still wait by my Lord's side, waiting, hoping that some day he will fully restore and transform my physical pain. But because of His love I do feel hope and see light and life even in my circumstances of not having full physical healing. Death has lost... fear has lost... sorrow has lost. Love has won.
Then I met Jesus, the man who transformed me. He knew me and He knew my hurt. He came to me, Mad Mary, and by the power of his love, he turned my darkness into dawn. I was no longer Mad Mary, I was just Mary.
After my Lord drove the demons and pain out of my body, I could have returned to my home in Magdala. Before I had been Mad Mary, I had had a home, a life there. Yet, I was frightened. How would the people back home react to me? Would they still see me as Mad Mary? And I was afraid that one day Mad Mary would return. Would I again become Mad Mary when my Savior left? I did not want to leave this man’s side who turned darkness to light. Instead of returning home, I surrendered everything I had once had for this holy man and his ministry.
But one day, men came and took my Lord. Most of His male disciples fled, but my woman friends and I, we stood firm. We did not run. We did not lie about our commitment. For every agonizing hour, we watched him beaten, stripped naked, and nailed to a cross. My Savior who healed my brokenness, now suffered beyond anything I could imagine. We stood nearby through it all silently, watching the Lord we loved breathe his last breath.
My friend’s son took Him from the cross, and placed him in the tomb. We kept a silent vigil as sorrow and grief filled our hearts. Our Lord, who loved us fully, who had given us hope and light and life, was dead. He was dead! He had loved us, in the way only He could love. How could we now live fully without His love?
Alive - Mary Magdalene by Natalie Grant
When He spoke my name in the garden that day it was not “Mad Mary.” But my name: Mary. When he spoke my name, he announced my total restoration and transformation. The power of His love conquered the Mad Mary, never to return. His love brought life and light to my eyes. Death has lost and love has won.
I still see the power of Jesus' love in my life. While I have not physically been restored and transformed, I know that He still speaks my name, Sarah, with love. He has conquered a lot of my fear and sorrow in my pain, and has healed me a lot emotionally from the strain of every day chronic pain. I have experienced physical healing in some ways, and in other ways, I still wait by my Lord's side, waiting, hoping that some day he will fully restore and transform my physical pain. But because of His love I do feel hope and see light and life even in my circumstances of not having full physical healing. Death has lost... fear has lost... sorrow has lost. Love has won.
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